This book came out earlier this year and I’ve been dying to check it out.

Archie is non-binary while Tristan is a cis dude. After being friends for a long time, Archie’s pronouns changed and Tristan happily changed his language. As any good ally should, he also has done a lot of work to help others learn about pronouns.

I’m a big believer in people learning better when they’re having an enjoyable time and laughing. The two friends go over pronoun basics in a hilariously snarky way, and I feel like it’s a great way for newbies to get a handle on using they/them pronouns.

The two have a great back-and-forth about one of the most common questions people have when they’re asked to use other pronouns:

“Now, one might be asking, why would someone choose to use gender neutral pronouns? There are a huge list of reasons, but the truth is — it doesn’t stinkin’ matter! You aren’t owed an explanation or reason for someone wanting to use different pronouns. It’s your responsibility as a decent human being to learn and use whatever pronouns they ask you to.” [pgs 19-20]

Archie talks about how difficult it is to be misgendered every single day. They liken it to having a brick added to their backpack with each misgendering.

BIG SAME.

It’s so tiring to see people just assume others are a part of the binary. Then again, I remember people don’t have all the same information or education I have had.

The pair also goes into how great it would be to have every group or personal introduction include pronouns. The more we can normalize talking about pronouns, the better we can help everyone learn about them.

When someone is being misgendered around you, you should move to correct that. First, it might help to have a preliminary convo with your non-binary or gender nonconforming pal about how they want that handled. Some of us aren’t out in certain aspects of our lives.

Finally, Archie talks about how hard it can be to come out as a non-binary person. They even touch on cutting toxic people out of our lives.

Verdict

All in all, this is the perfect book to snag to give to important people in your life to explain pronouns. While the focus is on they/them, you could easily ask others to read this with your pronouns in mind. It’s a must-read, especially for allies looking to support us.

You can snag the book on Amazon, Smitten Kitten, or wherever else you pick up books.