In the last few weeks, everything in my life got put on hold. I owe everyone an explanation.
In 2007, I met my husband. We were engaged in 2012, and then we got married in 2014. Within a few years, I discovered my queerness and gender fluidity. If I’m honest, I thought that once we got through that period, we would be golden.
I was wrong.
T and I are uh… not quite getting a divorce, but that’s for now. It’ll be an inevitability as we’re moving to being friends.
I have a lot of love for him. But I have realized that I’m not *in* love with him… He’s realized the same with me, too.
We’re still living together, but will reevaluate when our lease is up early next year – or sooner if we need to.
As sad as I am about it, part of it is him struggling with my queerness and gender. I would rather feel seen in full than in part, but it is what it is.
We’ve been polyamorous for a little bit, but he only recently began dating. For those of you who don’t know what that means, it means I’ve been on dates and relatively recently more seriously dating. Polyamory is about many loves, and I’m happy to answer more questions about that. I haven’t been as out about it to avoid awkwardness with family, but have reached a point where I’m past that.
This weekend was a weekend away and I think we needed that space to process things. I went to my first Pride (!) this weekend with one of my partners. It was awesome, and they really helped me process a lot of things.
I also had a lot of great sex which is always helpful.
My hope is that, within a few weeks, things will find a new stride that brings back the podcast and the chat. Naturally, I will try to keep people in the loop.
I’m really grateful that I have so many wonderful people in my life like them. I appreciate each and every one of you.